Friday = Blue (on Thursday)

Here is my final Week of Color post. Bear got one tooth on Saturday and one more on Wednesday!!!

Blue glass in the beach stuff jar in my bathroom.
Cute baby bunting Bear got for his first Christmas. Ready to pack away--it's too small.

Gorgeous vase dad gave me a couple years ago. Sits on the bookshelf in my room.
Love these shoes :)
Kid's couch from my childhood. I mean to replace the funky blue and rust 70's fabric at some point. Currently in Princess' room, where it is climbed on more than sat on.
One of my dad's paintings/collages--a Christmas gift. It's a tiny one, about 4" x 4".

Princess insisted I take a photo of her blue princess ring from McDonald's. Big rock :)
Chinese lanterns hanging in the kids' room. I got them at a gorgeous little store called Landlubber that went out of business.
We won this at a family reunion a few years ago. Princess looked over the goods up for auction (to support the Family Association) and decided she needed to have this. She adores it from afar as it sits on the high shelf in her room and we get it down for her sometimes.
Gorgeous little dress for this summer from (where else) eBay.

Great pot holder made by a lady named Wanda that my sister bought for me as a late birthday present at the festival in the next town over that we went to last Saturday. She chose one with bamboo.
Yes, I am a Nielsen Panelist! And I love it!
I got these bins at Bed Bath and Beyond on sale and tagged them with pictures so that Princess could tell where to put away her toys. Works like a charm for my husband too.
Blue bibs by Rosena. Rosena retired and I'm sad.

Thursday = Red (on Tuesday)

So here you have red day, late. Princess has been so cute, she keeps asking me what color today is, and since we ran out, I've been letting her choose :)
This is the bag we packed for Princess when we went to the hospital to have Bear.
Another new cook book from the Boise Public Library sale.
Little red leather box my mom gave to Princess for Valentine's Day.

Red chair my dad gave the kids for Christmas and a little Rageddy Ann & Andy pillow from Rosena.
Red tulip from the yard--planted by the neighbors in secret a few years ago and still coming up each Spring.
Bushes on the way home from our walk.
Have you ever seen strawberries screaming to be filled more than these? Cheesecake? Whipped cream? Nutella?

~~~

It has been a sad seven days. The death of a friend's husband in a tragic, horrific accident and the death of another friend's precious baby girl, soon to be adopted, in a poor foreign country far away from this family that adores her. I believe in life after death, I believe that families will be together in that life as they were in this one, and yet the suffocating pain of loss is so real and so heartbreaking. It is comforting to know they live on, but crushing that they are missing from our circles of family and friendship for who knows how long. No hugging, no birthday parties, no weddings. That's hard and it's lonely.

I've struggled the last few days, wondering how to support and comfort Keeley and now Michelle because I desperately want to do something. I'm not as close to either of them as I'd like to be--life is busy for everyone and it is a constant struggle to make time for the most important things, like friendships. I have a great fear (as many do) of making it worse. Of offending or hurting them, of making it all more unbearable than it already is. I've pondered what I would want, and come up with nothing I feel is useful because everyone grieves differently. What I would want may not be what they would want. I have heard that the worst thing is to do nothing, to stay away . . . so I'm mostly resolved not to, if I can figure out what shape my not staying away should take. It's hard to think of what comes next, though. How do they go on? How do we walk beside them through the valley?

There is a beautiful blog by the wife of Todd Smith (from the group Selah), about the birth and loss of their daughter Audrey and it's a place I've gone on and off the past month. Angela Smith is a woman of great faith, and in her honesty about grief and belief she has brought me a lot of comfort. The strange thing is that when I first stumbled on her blog, I wasn't grieving for anyone. This week, I've been grateful for a place to go that helps me remember that the Creator has a purpose for each of us and though it isn't always what we think it will be or what feels right to us, but if we keep on believing and holding on, we're going to be alright.

Wednesday = Orange

Okay, so it is Thursday. I'm a day behind. Just pretend it's Wednesday. Princess is sick and so is my husband. The baby is teething and not sleeping well. I'm exhausted. But here's some orange for you.
We got these at a consignment store for Princess a couple years ago. It was just after she saw "Finding Nemo" and she didn't care that they were practically falling off. Now they fit her pretty well and she still loves them.
These are scarves that I found for Princess on eBay last year to use for creative movement. I looked for the ones that are actually supposed to be for dance classes and they were hugely expensive! These were "real" scarves and I was thrilled to get a big pile of them in all different patterns and colors for less than a dollar a piece! She loves to get them out twirl with them, and I love to watch her when she does.
I love April Cornell's kids clothing line--Cornelloki :) I got this one on eBay for summer this year.
Until Princess came along, I hadn't purchased anything orange for my home or wardrobe, well, ever. The only color I enjoy less than orange is brown. Yet I ended up with a child who adores orange and yellow. This dress is a surprise for Princess' 5th birthday, so she hasn't seen it yet. Eyelet, gorgeous brilliant orange poppies, delicate green leaves and this stunning green satin belt with a silk flower at the waist. I can't wait to see her face when she opens it!

Tuesday = Yellow

Today is my baby brother's birthday. He's also my only brother and he isn't really a baby anymore, next year he'll be thirty. I remember the day he was born. I had just turned four, and my Gram came from Idaho to Kansas to stay with me while my parents went to the hospital. I had known since they told me that we were having a baby that it would be a boy (though no one knows how) and I was so excited to have a baby brother!

When they left for the hospital, Gram made me a fort out of the two arm chairs in the living room with a blanket over them and I remember the warm light from the kitchen filtering through into my soft tent. I remember that ticklish feeling of excitement in my chest, trying to fall asleep, the thought that when I woke up in the morning my brother would be born was running the grass in my head flat.

They brought him home and the first time I held my "Buddy" was sitting in the blue & purple tapestry rocking chair. It was love at first sight. Happy birthday, bro.

Curiousbird says Tuesday is Yellow Day. I'm not really a yellow person. It was harder for me to find things today, and I only made it barely under the wire--it's four minutes 'til midnight.
Two new cookbooks for my collection from the Boise Public Library book sale.
A painting my husband around the time we were married that hangs in the hall. Another pot I painted. This one has an almost dead undetermined citrus plant in it and sits under the painting on the dresser in the hall.
Yellow bibs from Rosina.
New summer eyelet for Princess.
Yellow Play-doh. We go through this stuff like you wouldn't believe and are making someone rich. I recently bought Kool-aid to color my very own home made stuff, but I haven't gotten around to it yet.

Monday = Green

I decided to take part in curious bird's challenge, A Week of Color. Today I wandered around my house looking for green. I found a lot of it since my husband and I both really like the color green in almost every variation. It was so fun! I woke up with it on my mind and automatically dressed us all in green :) Okay, so maybe I went a little overboard on this, but I figured this will reveal more bits of stuff about me, some of which you might actually find interesting. Don't worry, I have much less yellow stuff in my house.

First we have back yard photos. Ignore the monster grass. We have yet to find a reliable, reasonable, mowing service and we hate mowing. Still, we like grass and are not ready to move to lava rock and pea gravel. But I digress. This is a fabulous Safari park bench my mom got Princess a couple years back. We finally set it up this fall in time for it to get suitably weathered.
I think this might be potato sprouts!!!!!!!! I can not tell you how excited I am at this possibility. Please take a look at this photo and tell me that mine look enough like them to actually be potatoes. I planted mine (red, purple & yellow) on St. Patrick's day, as suggested and have been waiting and wondering and moaning in hopes of seeing some 'tater action.

These are my strawberry plants. The leaves are unfurling and there are even little flower buds! Beautimous!
Princess insisted I take this one. My mom sends the kids rubber ducks for every holiday so we have tons of them in cute little costumes in a rainbow of colors. This one I think I bought for the baby before he was born. We're a little bit rubber ducky obsessed in this house.

This is my bathroom. The walls are a dusky, pale aqua that I fall in love with again every time I see it. The bamboo actually came in a bouquet of flowers a few years back and it rooted in the vase and I didn't have the heart to throw it out. The fish, which also has a touch of green-ness to it was found 15 years ago at the beach in Chetzamoka Park.
This piece of pottery was the first original art my husband and I bought after we were married. It is by Ann Selberg and we loved both the color and the shape. We felt very grown up and sophisticated as we carried it home from the arts festival. It currently houses my collection of brightly colored pebbles.
I have a thing for dishes and I love to entertain with them. My extended family supports and encourages this by giving me more (than I could possibly ever use). Here a few of my favorite green pieces, and one of our green backed dining room chairs.

This is the Baby Bear. I tried to get a photo of the adorable overalls he is wearing today--they have green peas embroidered on the chest--but he just wanted the camera and thought we were playing a game. So I started to feed him lunch and choose this green batik turtle bib. He was mad about not being given the camera.

I love these shoes. I got them for Princess at an incredibly cheap close out discount from babystyle, which I discovered before Princess was born and I love dearly for kids clothing. When they put their basics on sale, I stock up, and occasionally something less-basic goes on a great sale too!
This is a new-for-summer eBay find for Princess. A frilly, girly, lime green dress of deliciousness. I love having kids to dress! Gives the cat a break.

My mother gave this deck prism to me about a dozen years ago for a special personal occasion. An explanation of what it is is here. She told me that she appreciated how, since the time I was born, it seemed to her that I reflected and magnified the light of the Universe, bringing light everywhere I went. There I times when I seriously doubt her assessment, but this is a tangible reminder of her love for me and her faith in me. I keep it on the bookshelf in bedroom in front of my poetry and writing books.
I decided several years ago to grow citrus in my home. Please, don't bother to tell me I am crazy or that it can't be done. I'm still hoping. This is the most successful plant I have. It is a lime tree and two years in a row I got blossoms on it! I am hoping this year we might make it happen too. The blue pot is one I painted myself.
Dressing boys is fun too! Baby bear has lots of green clothing, and here's a sampling of his green warm weather togs.

This is the office. The figurine was given to me by my Gram for my 11th birthday. I recently found it in a box of stuff and pulled it out to look at and keep her on my mind these days. Yes, I buy scotch tape by the dozen-box-pack. What can I say. I have a 4-year-old. The post-its on the bottom were given to me last month by my mom for my birthday. She got them at a Coldwater Creek retail store, but the only place I could find them online was here. You can also see a piece of the wall there--it's a soft apple-y green.
This is Princess's new raincoat, hanging in the hall. It is a Vintage Mousefeathers coat with old fashioned produce and flowers on it. I love it!
This is a framed photo of ballet dancers that my brother gave me for Christmas this last year and it sits on the back of the toilet in the guest/kid's bathroom. Most people have stopped giving me ballerina stuff, but my brother always manages to find something classy and sentimental.
When Princess was a baby, her nursery was decorated with Cecily Mary Barker's flower fairies. This was a bird feeder that my brother gave me for the nursery that originally had chains on it. I took them off and used it for all the little stuff that accumulates. It's the Sweet Pea Fairy's toes you see there in the background.
My dad gave Princess a set of these little German wood hen houses 2 Christmases ago and she loves them. The hens bobble up and down when you move their cage.

We cannot endure to the end alone. It is important
that we help by lifting and strengthening one another.
- Elder Robert D. Hales

Today was one of those long days that start out one place and end up all over the road, taking you places you didn't really intend to go, and missing planned stops completely. Not a bad day, just a wiggly one.

I just went in to give the Bear another round of starters (wagon wheels, mum mums, & puffs) and heard the neighbors. This happens often as we live in one of those Mayberry-ish subdivisions where you're just a few feet from other people any way you breathe. The cool thing about this for us is that our neighbors are marvelous. In fact, they are one of the reasons we keep deciding not to move (even though our house is a little cramped these days). They are delightful people and have become good friends. And they ignore what they hear coming out our windows, which makes them pretty invaluable.

What I heard, was a dad-sound which meant "quick, she's getting away". I glanced out the window to see the buck naked 2 year old sprinting out the back door and then the mom take two strides and catch her like a child rustling pro, hoisting her back into the house. I love watching other people parent effectively and without mean-ness.

It's hard to find good neighbors and even harder to find ones that want to actually be friends and not just neighbors. Toni and I have borrowed enough eggs from one another over the years to make an omelet the size of Texas and our backyards are mutually inclusive when the weather gets warm. They were the ones we woke up to take Princess when I was in labor with the Baby Bear and they were the first non-family to see him since they brought her over in the morning to see her brother for the first time. We've seen each other through horrific pregnancies, miserable holidays and lots of joyful events and I'm grateful to know we have people we love and trust so close by. Toni and I are busy women and frankly, we don't get as much time to talk as we'd like to... but I'm so glad she's next door!

"Today's problems cannot be solved if we still think the way we thought when we created them."
~Albert Einstein

Monday again and I find myself trying to swim to the surface yet again. Lately, I've been overwhelmed. Not by any one thing, just in general. Being a parent is a huge responsibility and so is caring for my home and family physically. With my shoulder injuries I'm in some level of pain pretty much all the time. I may have said this before, but my obituary will not be one of those that talks about how the deceased suffered chronic pain honorably without a murmur of complaint. Oh, I try not to bore people repeatedly with the details, but the reality is that it hurts and sometimes it really gets me down. I hate it when my house gets out of control and I fall behind in things that I want to get done because I just can't do as much as I'd like.

Yesterday was difficult. When we went to pick up the pizza the other night, I didn't notice Princess playing with the dome light in the car. My husband had early meetings at the church and got a ride when he realized the car was dead, but didn't call me until 30 minutes before we were supposed to be there to tell me. I was already frustrated and late (I am considering not sleeping Saturday nights in order to attempt to actually arrive on time with the kids) and so he tried to call around and find someone to come jump the car, but all of the good, on time people had already left and he's shy about asking for help anyway.

I got upset. I told him that if he wanted to be there on time, he should go sit down and not worry about us (I was very huffy about it, too). I seriously considered that maybe it was a sign from God and I should be allowed to stay home. The problem is that we live six blocks with nice sidewalks from the church. I take longer walks on a regular basis. Plus, Princess was supposed to do a thing in her class and I had the interest sheets for the HFPE groups I am trying to get off the ground...so I got us fed and dressed and loaded up the stroller with the 25 pound kid and the diaper bag and my church bag and put me and Princess' nice shoes in a bag and we got our walking shoes on us, and we hoofed it. Missed the first meeting, but we were late anyway, it really only took about 12 minutes to get there, walking slow. I'm considering doing it more often when the weather gets warmer.

I can't even go into the after-church drama, but we had a birthday party to go to and the Home Teachers coming over and a car that wouldn't start and a house so messy you couldn't get from the door to the couch. My husband is the most patient man in the world, and I am truly grateful for his kindness when I have a total freak-out. We were close yesterday.

All of this rambling does have something to do with the quote at the top. In moments of clarity, I remember that the busy-ness of my life is a choice. I love my life. From being with my kids all day, to church stuff, to CU and Night Writers and eBay and television. My life is full, and it's full of really good things. Clarity reminds me that everything will be okay, that I will be okay and that I need to smile and remember how grateful I am. When I get overwhelmed, like I have been the past week, I wonder why I do what I do--pretty much in every aspect of my life--and when I settle down I realize that it's my thinking that gets me to that place. When things pile up, I can choose to look at it as an abundance of blessings or as evidence I am inadequate at keeping my life together. When I feel my problems can not be solved, it is because I am thinking along the second set of lines instead of the first.

Today, I am going to remember who I am and see myself and my abundance as blessings.